Coparenting Tips for Divorced Parents

Coparenting Tips for Divorced Parents

coparenting

When you and your partner get divorced, you might stop being spouses. However, you both still need to be parents to any children you share. Practicing effective Coparenting habits will ensure you, your former spouse and your kids remain happy.

Be Flexible

There might be a court-appointed visitation schedule in place, but feel free to be flexible under certain circumstances. If your former spouse wants to take the kids to a fun event on a day you are supposed to have them, be open to that. There might be a time in the future when you will want to take the kids to something on one of your former partner’s days. Also, your kids will enjoy having some extra freedom.

Be Empathetic

Your kids are going to miss their other parent at times. Allow them a chance to voice any complaints or frustrations. Never blow up in your kids’ faces about how their other parent is a deadbeat or anything like that. You are only going to be creating unnecessary conflict.

Keep the Other Parent in the Loop

When your kids earn an accomplishment or do something really fantastic, inform your former spouse. He or she will appreciate being kept in the circle. A simple email will suffice, and it will encourage the other parent to let you know everything the kids are doing over there.

Respect the Other Parent’s Time With the Kids

A big part of Coparenting is about respecting boundaries. When the other parent is with the kids, you do not want to constantly call or email the kids to ask how they are doing. Respect your children’s time with your ex. Think about it this way: you naturally would not want your ex constantly contacting you asking about the kids.

Communicate With the Other Parent

Some divorcees get in the bad habit of using the kids to deliver messages to the other parent. This is a surefire way to ensure something gets lost in translation. Regardless of why the two of you decided to get divorced, you should still be capable of communicating effectively. If there is something your ex needs to know, tell him or her yourself. Do not put your kids in the awkward position of being messengers, especially if you need to say something important.

Sharing custody can be tough, especially at first. However, you and your ex ultimately want the same thing. You both want your kids to have a great childhood. Practice these Coparenting tips so that everyone ends up being happy.

About Oliver Ross

Oliver Ross, JD*, PhD founded Out-of-Court Solutions Inc. in 1995 and since then has mediated over 3,000 divorce and family matters. He is a select member of the Maricopa Superior Court Family Mediation roster