Grief’s Impact on Divorce Mediation

Often, when we think of divorce, we envision the driving emotion that causes contention to be anger.  But, it is important to understand grief’s impact on the divorce process.  Even though you are parting ways as a couple, effective communication can make the divorce process much quicker and easier for everyone.  But, when one or both individuals are consumed with grief, it can cloud your judgment and affect your emotions, leading to communication problems.  This common problem highlights the importance of working with a divorce mediator, who can be neutral and help both individuals navigate the process in a fair way that facilitates effective communication.

First, it is important to acknowledge that grief is a very normal feeling in divorce, even if you are certain of your decision.  And, sometimes it can be hard to recognize that grief may be influencing your decisions, words, and actions.  Grief can be experienced by anyone, at any point during the divorce process.  For some, it will be at the outset, and for others, it may be months or years after the divorce is finalized – there is no way to predict grief.

The role of a divorce mediator is to facilitate better communication between both individuals and for the benefit of both individuals during legal, financial, tax, and other decision-making.  It is for this reason that it is important to acknowledge and normalize grief for all parties involved, including children, rather than deny it.  Once acknowledged, it is easier to build trust between all individuals and the mediator to move towards fair and informed decisions for everyone, including children.

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