How to Approach Friends and Family About Your Divorce

How to Approach Friends and Family About Your Divorce


Getting a divorce is difficult enough as it is with all the stress and paperwork you have to go through. However, once you and your former spouse decide to end it for good, something very tough presents itself: informing friends and family. People will take the news in different ways, so it is impossible to guess how certain people will react. However, there are ways you should go about telling people about the news.

Close Friends and Family

These are the people you should tell first. It is preferable to meet with people face-to-face, but if that is not possible, a phone call or heartfelt email will suffice. It is important to tell your closest support network of the divorce as soon as possible. You will need all the care you can get for this time. Your family and friends are there to help, so do not feel weird telling them of what is happening.

Extended Family and Friends

These are the people in life you are close to, but you do not expect them to be there for you emotionally. There are various ways you can go about telling these people about the separation. You can send a mass email to everyone informing them. Sometimes it is beneficial to talk to one of your close friends or family members, and make them the person to inform others. Additionally, social media is a common place to express important news. You do not want to get on Facebook right away to tell everyone what you are feeling. Take your time making sure the most important people in your life know of the situation. From there, you can make a Facebook post.


It is wise to tell your boss of the divorce as soon as possible. This does not have to be a lengthy conversation, but you want your supervisor to know in case you need to take time off to go to a mediation meeting or just need a personal day for your own emotional health. Telling coworkers can be tricky. If you are not that close with your coworkers, there may not be a need to make a big announcement. However, word can spread fast. It can be good to get ahead of the situation and tell people privately just so they know to respect your privacy.

It can feel awkward telling people something so personal you are going through. However, your closest loved ones will want to help. Once you inform people of the divorce, you will feel as though you have a real support network there to assist you.



About Oliver Ross

Oliver Ross, JD*, PhD founded Out-of-Court Solutions Inc. in 1995 and since then has mediated over 3,000 divorce and family matters. He is a select member of the Maricopa Superior Court Family Mediation roster