How to Guide Your Children Through Divorce

How to Guide Your Children Through Divorce

Divorce is difficult for everyone involved, but it is especially hard for children. They didn’t ask for any of this to happen. They are immature and unable to really process all the adult things involved in the process. That is why it is up to parents to ensure that they do everything possible to guide and help their children through the process with as little trauma as possible.

Keep It Civil

One of the worst things for children to go through is when their parents are fighting and trying to use them as some sort of weapon against the other parent. It is essential that parents understand kids are not some prize to be won in a divorce. They should never feel as if they have to choose one parent over the other. Blame should never be assigned to one parent over the other because it makes kids feel like they have to choose sides. This situation is not their choice and it is not their battle to fight. At the end of things, they will still have a relationship with the other parent, so it is essential to be civil and to not fight in front of them or drag them into things.

Be Honest

It may be tempting to shield your child from the reality of what is happening, but that won’t help them. You have to be honest with them. Depending on their age, you and your partner should sit down with them and tell them about the divorce. Explain what will happen and how things may change. Allow them to ask questions, too. Being as open as possible will keep them from feeling scared or alone during the process.

Emphasize What Won’t Change

Children, especially younger ones, may feel as if they are the reason behind the problems and that one of their parents doesn’t love them anymore. It is essential to ensure that children know they are loved and that the love you have for them isn’t going to change at all. Children may need reassuring often, so make sure you aren’t so caught up in things that you forget about them.

Divorce is scary for adults, so it is no surprise it can be devastating for a child. That is why it so important to not lose sight of what is really important in the whole divorce process. That is ensuring the children are affected the least by anything that happens and that their lives are kept as normal as possible. They should never feel afraid or like they are being forced to choose between their parents. As a parent, it is your job to just love them and do everything you can to ensure the end of your marriage doesn’t mean the end of your family.

 

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