How to Maintain a Positive Outlook at Home and at Work During Divorce


Going through a divorce is incredibly difficult. Even if the mediation proceedings are going well, you may still feel stressed and anxious. This can negatively impact how you behave at home and work. Fortunately, there are a few things you can do to feel better and be more productive during this time.

At Home

Getting separated from a spouse can throw simple routines into chaos. Therefore, it is wise to embrace the stable aspects of your life. You should spend time with your best friends you know you can rely on. You should not make any drastic changes to your life at this time. In the event you have to move to a new house, it should be relatively close to your old one. Additionally, you should not rush into a new relationship. Even if you know your divorce will be over soon, you do not want to immediately get into new commitments.

Another way to take your mind off things is to focus on hobbies. Exercising often is one of the best things you can do during this period of time. Spending just 30 minutes a day on some light exercise can do a lot for fighting off sadness. If you have any hobbies or groups you belong to, you should continue doing them. You may feel like staying indoors as much as possible, but being out and active is ultimately better for your health.

At Work

It can be tough trying to complete work assignments when something as life-changing as a divorce is occurring. It is a good idea to inform your boss of the situation. You do not have to give him or her all the messy details, but simply informing someone of what you are going through can help if you ever need to take a personal day.

Additionally, you should avoid contact with your ex-spouse while you are at work. Reading an email or taking a phone call can open fresh wounds. Work is a time to focus on work. Do not respond to those emails until you are home. If you must respond right away, take a few minutes to think about what you are going to say. You do not want anything to be misinterpreted.

Staying positive and focusing on the stable things in your life are some of the best things you can do while going through a divorce. Remember, you do not have to go through this time alone. You have people out there who care about you and are willing to help.

About Oliver Ross

Oliver Ross, JD*, PhD founded Out-of-Court Solutions Inc. in 1995 and since then has mediated over 3,000 divorce and family matters. He is a select member of the Maricopa Superior Court Family Mediation roster