How to Prepare for Divorce Mediation

Divorce mediation is one of the best options when it comes to undergoing the divorce process.  Divorce attorneys are incredibly expensive and if your divorce goes to court, it could take an incredibly long time which will only add to how much you pay.  Divorces are often contentious and there are many details to sort through in the midst of emotions running high.  Divorce mediation is an ideal choice because not only will divorce mediators with backgrounds in both law and psychology help you handle all of the legal aspects of your divorce, but they will also help you discuss your emotions in a respectful climate so that everyone has a chance to be heard.  In order to have the best results through divorce mediation, it is important to follow the tips below to be properly prepared for divorce mediation.

• Gather & Organize Financial Information
  • In order to make the divorce process as smooth as possible, it is best to immediately begin gathering all financial information and important documents. The necessary steps to divide finances and assets cannot happen if all of the information is not presented. Documents such as pay stubs, income tax receipt, bank accounts, mortgage documents need to be gathered and organized.
• Write Out Your Goals
  • Rather than trying to sort through your feelings in a room with your soon to be ex and a mediator, start by putting pen to paper on your own. Sit down and really think about what you hope to achieve through divorce mediation, the way you see things and what your ultimate goals are. With it written down, it will help you stay on track and be sure that you really say what you are thinking because sometimes, in the heat of the moment or in an emotional situation in divorce mediation, you can easily lose track of what is really important to you. A written list of your goals will help ensure you speak your mind.
• Try to Be Amicable
  • Divorces can be completely amicable or incredibly contentious. Emotions, the past, relationship dynamics and family situations run the gamut and divorce mediation can bring up all of those emotions. No matter what the past is, even if you have hurt feelings and anger, it is best to try to be amicable when going through divorce mediation. Not only will it be easier to endure if you are amicable, but the process will be quicker and no one benefits from big outbursts or angry screaming matches.
• Prioritize Your Children
  • Often, divorce is hardest on the children. Depending on their age, they may not be able to fully comprehend what is happening and they can get lost in the mess of the many emotions that are likely to surface when dividing property and debts. Rather than trying to get back at your soon to ex or using your children as pawns, prioritize your children so that you can remain focused on their needs and what is best for them. Talk to them about how the divorce is not their fault, explain what is happening but do not bash their other parent in front of them or try to force them to take sides, because sooner or later it will only end in heartache.