Why Mediation Is the Best Way to Get a Divorce

When people get married, they don’t imagine their union will ever end purposely. The sad truth is that despite the best of intentions, half of marriages result in divorce, and those who remarry are even more likely to experience it again. Marital dissolution brings heartache, confusion, stress, depression, and a multitude of other overwhelming emotions. The good news, however, is that many of those negative feelings can be lessened by the manner in which you legally terminate your relationship. The best way to do so is through mediation.

 

What Is Mediation?

Usually divorce brings to mind ugly court battles, but this doesn’t have to be the case. Whether you like each other or not, you can decide to be cooperative and take the route of mediation for a better outcome emotionally and economically. This process is an out-of-court solution involving a neutral, third-party member who is trained in law, and preferably also in psychology to help you handle your emotions.

The mediator is not your lawyer or judge and can’t make decisions for you or force you to do something. His or her job is to facilitate communication between you and your spouse so you can arrive at the terms of your marital dissolution, because no one knows better than the both of you what is best for your family and situation. Each of you will have uninterrupted time to share your perspectives and then you all will clarify goals and issues.

 

How Does Mediation Work?

Unlike a lawyer, a mediator doesn’t take sides, but instead helps you both to achieve what you want through respectful, effective negotiation. He or she also provides all the legal and financial information you need to make fully informed decisions and prepares the settlement and other necessary court documents. In order for you to arrive at this goal, there are rules you will be given and must follow.

You may be given the option of continual in-person appointments or as-needed assistance via phone, email, or video conference if you prepare your own divorce papers. You and your spouse are in control of how you want to proceed, how much time and money you want to spend in the process, and what you discuss during the meeting. You also have the choice to consult independently with lawyers and other experts to ensure a thorough, durable agreement.

 

What Are the Benefits?

Mediation is the most effective means of obtaining a divorce and brings the following benefits

• More cooperation. With another person guiding the conversation, you are more likely to resolve your problems without anger and argument. This makes things go more quickly and smoothly.
• More savings. Lawyers and litigation get expensive easily. Even if you try to file on your own, making a mistake can cost you. This path saves you money.
• More control. No one is making decisions for you and your family but you. A judge doesn’t need to be involved because you and your spouse come to a settlement on your own that you both are satisfied with.
• More amenability. Arriving at such a mutual agreement also increases the chances of you both sticking to its regulations so there are no further disputes.
• More stable feelings. When the two of you aren’t hashing it out in court and painting nasty pictures of each other, your feelings are more manageable. You are better able to end the marriage on a civil note and heal faster. If children are involved, they will adjust better as well.

Mediation is truly the most efficient and favorable way to get a divorce for all parties involved. If you and your spouse are willing, try it out. Most services offer a free consultation to help you determine if it’s the right method for you.